Some tricks to become a Pro Conversationalist

Person 1: Hey wassup?
Person 2: Nm. Going to colg. Wbu?
Person 1: Hmmm..
Person 2: ummm..k.hey i gtg..bye..cya..tc
Person 1: K..bye!!
The above convo is one of the best examples of a convo gone wrong! How many times has it happened to you, that the excitement of meeting someone fizzled out just because you didn't know what to say? This is not an unusual phenomenon, it happens to all of us! Many a times after saying goodbye to someone, we end up feeling that the interaction COULD have been better. So what is the solution to this? Believe me, it does not take a great conversationalist to liven up a meeting..
Here are two handy 'tricks' to save a dying convo, or to make sure you don't end up prematurely terminating your dialogue..

Trick 1: The 'old friend' technique
Many a times, the reason people don't open up to you soon, is because of the lack of 'TOTAL' comfort. We, as human beings, are naturally inclined to be reserved while dealing with someone we don't know too much. Then how do we break through this wall without too much of effort? The key is understanding unconscious perception.

Whenever we meet someone, the way we behave and talk with the other person creates an impression of us in his SUBCONSIOUS mind. He/she may not realise this, but this subconscious impression tends to influence his attitude and mindset towards us.

So how do we create the right impression? It dosent take too much..just be AT EASE! And the way you can do so is..IMAGINE THAT THE oTHER PERSON IS ONE OF YOUR OLDEST
FRIENDS, WHOM YOU ARE MEETING AFTER MANY YEARS. This may seem a little weird initially, but psychological studies have shown that it truely works! When we behave with
someone as if he is an old friend, his mind immediately recognises the 'friendly' signals and gets comfortable interacting with you. This increased ease livens up the
interactions which otherwise would have been quite dull. It may be difficult at first, but once you get used to it, just see how you and others (even those people whom you aren't too comfortable with) get along!

Trick 2:The 'repetition' technique
This technique is more of a 'trick' than last one. And a complete 'no-brainer' at that! Every conversation can be imagined as a tennis game. When you start a conversation, you basically 'serve'. This puts the ball in the other person's court. He has to strike back by replying to you. Now, the problem occurs when the ball is in YOUR court but you don't know what to say (how to strike)! This can be seen in the conversation example I gave at the beginning of this article..

'Person 1: Same here! Njoying colg life..
Person 2: Cool..'

Here the ball was in Person 2's court but he had no idea what to say! So what should he have done to avoid the blunder of saying something as dull as 'cool'? This is where the 'repetition technique' comes into play. What the guy should have said is- "Njoing colg life? Cool.. How?' As you see, this isn't too intelligent, but it does the job, as it puts the ball directly in Person 1's court! As a result of this simple question, Person 2 makes Person 1 elaborate on his college life,
thus bringing up new topics for discussion.
So the basic idea is this..Whenever you sense that you have nothing interesting to say, just ask the other person something directly related to his LAST WORDS TO YOU.Repeat it if needed (but intelligently..don't overdo it).


Hope the above two techniques help you the next time you don't wanna abruptly end your chats with people \m/
Post by
~~ Sachin Joglekar